Teurgis/Stories
Mistaking Nimbus to be a runaway lab tiger, Teurgis swoops in for an attack, but the misunderstanding is cleared up before anyone gets hurt. In apology, he offers his protection to Alk and co., a promise he soon makes good on. In the process, however, he accidentally cuts out power for the town, and flees to Starview Village in order to avoid paying reparations.
Alk: Pork, peas, onion, carrot... Think I tasted pineapple too...
Nimbus: What're you mutterin' to yourself about?
Alk: Oh, it's just the synthesized food we ate earlier... I'm trying to figure out the flavors.
Nimbus: It was all SoyMate, right? Why do you care so much?
Alk: I can't help wondering how they made it...
Alk: What seasonings did they use... And how'd they manage that sour tang?
Nimbus: You have a problem, pal. A coo-coo for cooking problem.
???: Found you!
Teurgis: Clear me some space! This target's mine!
Nimbus: Hey! What's the big idea?!
Teurgis: Wait... The tiger talks?!
Nimbus: I sure do. You got a problem with that, punk?
Teurgis: Are... you modded up? Wow, you totally look like a real tiger!
Teurgis: Oh, you're from a different world, huh? That's pretty awesome! No wonder everything seemed off.
Teurgis: Where do you find other worlds, anyways?
Teurgis: Eh, whatever. Sorry for the mix-up! I'm on the hunt for a big white tiger, so you can see why I got confused.
Alk: You're looking for a tiger in this town?
Teurgis: Yeah, it escaped from a research facility. They asked me to make sure it got back unharmed.
Nimbus: Unharmed? With the way you came at me?
Teurgis: Hey, I was only gonna knock you out. Just a little jolt, that's all!
Teurgis: Anyway, it's an open job, so whoever nabs it first gets the reward—a nice one too, from what I heard!
Teurgis: If you see the tiger, give me a holler. I'll come running!
Alk: Uh, are we just supposed to shout, or...
Teurgis: You can call me if you need help too. Consider it an apology for earlier! See ya!
Alk: There he goes... Must be running on a schedule.
Nimbus: Well, yeah. They've got lab freaks on the loose. This world's a mess.
Alk: You say that like other worlds don't have their own monsters...
Alk: Nimbus, look.
Nimbus: Huh?
Nimbus: He mixed me up with UGLY?! Guy must be dumb, blind, or both.
Alk: Should we call for him?
Alk: I don't want him to think we're trying to take the prize money.
Alk: Teurgis!
Teurgis: Teurgis, reporting for duty!
Alk: He actually showed up...
Nimbus: You a damn dog?
Teurgis: I've got the best mods for my ears and feet! Just say my name, and I'll come running!
Teurgis: So is that the tiger then?
Teurgis: Huh, looks a lot scarier than I pictured.
Nimbus: You gonna wet your pants, scaredy cat? Need us to lend a paw?
Teurgis: Oh, put a sock in it! I can do this on my own! Watch me!
Teurgis: Plasma Gimmick Charge!
Teurgis: Maximum power, no holds barred! I'm not gonna lose to the likes of you!
Alk: Did the power just... go out?
Teurgis: Well... Shoot.
Alk: Teurgis, what did you just do?
Teurgis: Oh, you know, a little illegal mod here, a little extra plasma in my blade there, and the output levels go a little crazy...
Teurgis: Anyway, we better get out of here!
Alk: Why are we running too?!
Teurgis: You're my accomplices now! If you don't wanna pay for repairs, then move it!
Alk: Say what?!
Teurgis: Come on, take us to that world of yours!
Nimbus: This guy...
Teurgis: Damn, this is good! You're a genius, Alk! This tastes exactly like synthesized food but a hundred times better!
Teurgis: Man... I had no idea natural ingredients had this flavor...
Alk: Will you finally go home after you finish eating?
Teurgis: You kidding? This place is awesome! I'm gonna stay here for the time being!
Light: Alk... Who is this person?
Alk: Teurgis. Called himself a troubleshooter or something and invited himself along.
Alk: He's more like a trouble maker if you ask me though...
Teurgis: Hey! Was that a pun?!
At an arcade, Teurgis shows Alk a VR world made from memories that he sold off, which makes Alk suspect the troubleshooter of betraying the existence of Starview. As a token of his loyalty, Teurgis takes Alk on a motorbike ride—which goes well up until the point he crashes it into the DAN building, and he is forced once again to flee to Starview to avoid paying reparations.
Teurgis: Today, Alk, I'm gonna show you the most popular attraction in town!
Teurgis: You're gonna love it, I promise!
Alk: I'm not sure I trust your promises...
Alk: The other day, you almost made us buy that sketchy perpetual motion machine, and before that—
Teurgis: This time, we're just gonna have some normal fun! Pinky swear!
Alk: Wha? Huh?! Weren't we somewhere else a second ago?
Teurgis: Welcome to the World of Excitement!
Teurgis: Hmm, the default settings are kinda boring.
Alk: Ah! Are we in... the Kaleidoscope?
Teurgis: Pretty realistic, right?
Teurgis: Then there's also this mode!
Alk: Monsters?!
Teurgis: Keep calm, and carry on!
Teurgis: It's a VR beat 'em up game!
Teurgis: Heh, this is too easy!
Teurgis: Come on, Alk, give it a go!
Alk: So this is a game...
Alk: Huh, it's actually kinda fun.
Teurgis: Told you! The sound effects in here kick ass.
Alk: By the way... How'd this world create a game about the Kaleidoscope? Don't tell me...
Teurgis: If you liked this place, you'll love the next area too! Let's go!
Alk: This is Challua's forest, isn't it?
Alk: We took you there because you wanted to meet Shroombo's friends...
Teurgis: Yep! And remember what happened when we got there?
Alk: THIS happened!
Teurgis: Exactly! As you can see...
Teurgis: The whole shebang's built from my memories!
Announcer: Perfect! Excellent!
Alk: So you sold your memories.
Teurgis: That's right! You can sell just about anything in this town!
Teurgis: Takes a bunch of credits to design VR from scratch.
Teurgis: But thanks to my special cybernetics, it was easy to convert recorded memories into data and make the process cheaper.
Alk: Uh-huh...
Teurgis: Unique memories are worth a ton too, so it's a pretty useful function.
Alk: Teurgis... Did you sell your memories on Starview Village?
Teurgis: Huh?
Alk: Answer me, Teurgis.
Teurgis: H-hey now, you think I'd do you dirty like that?!
Alk: Well, you haven't exactly been the most stand-up guy.
Teurgis: Is that how it is? All right, Alk. I get it.
Teurgis: I'll just have to show you how much of a nice guy I can be!
Teurgis: How's that, Alk? Feels great, yeah?
Alk: Yeah... Not gonna lie, this is pretty awesome!
Teurgis: I've been dying to give you a lift—to thank you for having my back, you know?
Teurgis: Enjoy the ride, because you aren't getting this anywhere else!
Alk: Thanks! Motorbikes are really cool! Did you always like them?
Teurgis: Uhhhh, no? This is the first time I've taken one out for a spin!
Alk: This is your what.
Teurgis: Shoot! Not again!
Alk: Are you kidding me?!
Teurgis: Hoo boy... That was DAN's building...
Teurgis: No way I can afford the repairs! Alk, you gotta hide me Starview Village!
Alk: Again?!
Teurgis: Hey, I bought that bike for YOU! And I haven't paid back the loan yet.
Teurgis: But all I need is some more memories to sell, and I'll get the credits in no time.
Teurgis: So guess it's back to world-hopping!
Alk: You are actually the worst.
Alk and Teurgis attempt to rescue Light from the clutches of a mutant trader. When the trader offers to buy Teurgis out to his side, the troubleshooter refuses and attacks to save his friend. Now a wanted criminal, Teurgis plans on finding work in other worlds.
Alk: Light! Light, where are you?
Teurgis: What's wrong, Alk?
Alk: Teurgis?! You sure you're not a modded dog?
Teurgis: Okay, jokes aside, did something happen to Light?
Alk: Y-yeah, he just vanished!
Alk: He said he'd only be gone for a bit! And he wouldn't just ABANDON us.
Teurgis: Tch... Bet they got him.
Alk: You know something about this?
Teurgis: I've got a pretty good hunch. Follow me!
Teurgis: I'm fairly sure somebody snatched Light—thinking he's a rare mutant.
Alk: Light, a mutant? That's crazy!
Teurgis: To us, yeah. But these people think any animal they haven't seen before is a mutant.
Alk: Okay, but... Light's not exactly an animal either.
Teurgis: See, mutant battles are prime entertainment around these parts. Even a single match involves a lot of moving credits.
Teurgis: A rare mutant would fetch a hefty price, since they're always in demand.
Alk: So you think...
Teurgis: There's a trader in this neighborhood that's pretty famous. I've done a few jobs for him, actually.
Teurgis: Come on... This way.
Light: Alk! And... Teurgis?
Alk: Light! Are you okay?
Light: Stay back! Don't touch anything!
Teurgis: An electromagnetic cage, huh? Yeah, that thing will fry you to a crisp.
Light: I'm sorry. I should not have let my guard down.
Teurgis: Hey, that's enough. Friends look out for each other, yeah?
Teurgis: I know you'd do the same for us if we were the ones in the cage.
Teurgis: Hope you're ready to move fast, because we're not in the clear yet!
Light: Thank you!
Trader: Well, well. If it isn't Teurgis. Fancy seeing you here.
Trader: It's a shame a troubleshooter like you has turned to stealing. If you needed money, you should've taken my job offer.
Teurgis: Sorry to disappoint, but Light here is my friend.
Trader: Friend? Don't make me laugh! A troubleshooter values credits above honor, doesn't he?
Trader: Wait, that's it. My original figure wasn't enough, was it? How much do you want?
Trader: For a greedy bastard like you, I'll double the price. Surely that's satisfactory, Teurgis.
Teurgis: Double?
Teurgis: Hey, Alk. How many credits are you coughing up?
Alk: Uh... None?
Teurgis: Haha, that's right.
Teurgis: Underestimate a troubleshooter, and you'll pay for it!
Teurgis: Kicked that job offer to the curb, then I get saddled with robbery, assault, and property damage...
Teurgis: Man, this town won't forget about me anytime soon! Hahaha!
Alk: Come hide in Starview. This time, you're invited.
Light: Teurgis, this is all my fault. I am sorry.
Teurgis: Hey now, I said none of that! Besides, I hated that guy anyways.
Teurgis: I don't do nasty jobs, no matter how much they pay!
Alk: Appreciate it, Teurgis.
Alk: You were actually kinda cool today!
Teurgis: Bring on the praise! I'm the world's number one troubleshooter!
Teurgis: For real though, I might've gone a little too hard. Could be a long time before things cool off enough for me to come back...
Teurgis: In the meantime, I think I'll go look for work in other worlds.
Light: In Starview, you shall have food and a warm bed. If there is anything more you desire, all you need do is ask.
Teurgis: Thanks for the offer, but honestly, I'd rather be in debt than be bored!
Teurgis: I'm itching for action! Like...
Teurgis: What if I fostered animals?
Teurgis: Maybe started an interstellar sanctuary? Tried my hand at a little breeding?
Teurgis: And then, if anyone wanted to see my beauties, I'd charge them! I'm gonna be filthy rich!
Light: Why is he looking at me as he says all that?
Alk: Teurgis'll figure out how to survive anywhere.
Light: He is more resilient than a weed...
Teurgis: Yep, got it all figured out! Alk, Light, it's go time!
Alk: Wait for us!