Tae Yamada (Zombie Land Saga Collab)/Stories
As a favor to Tatsumi, Alk and co. keep watch over Tae during her errand with Sakura to sell fish cakes. When a rabid dog bites off Tae's Head and runs away, they are fortunately able to revive it.
Tatsumi: All gathered? Great! Good morning, everyone!
Sakura: So, um... What exactly are we here for?
Tatsumi: It's simple. Sakura, Tae, I have a job for you two.
Sakura: Hooray! Work's come in, Tae-chan!
Tae: Gwar.
Alk: And I'm guessing you called the rest of us here to help with that?
Tatsumi: Oh, not with the work itself. I need someone to watch over Tae.
Light: Wait, explain yourself. I'm not sure I like where this is go-
Tatsumi: Sorry, gotta run! I have other matters to tend to! the job details are in this memo. Toodle-oo!
Sakura: It's been a while since we last got to work together! Let's give it our all, Tae-chan!
Tae: Gwar.
Light: Er, just to be sure... Is she going to be all right?
Light: I mean, can we be certain she won't bite audience members during a performance?
Sakura: Yeah, that can be a bit of a problem, huh? Well, just consider it her way of communicating.
Light: Are we really going to just leave it at that?!
Alk: Which reminds me: what's with the nickname "Legendary Tae Yamada"?
Sakura: Yeah, the word is she's a legend...
Nimbus: Heck, does it really matter? let's get a move on already.
Light: Hold it! I remain unconvinced that this is a good idea!
Shopkeep: I look forward to your assistance with today's product promotion campaign!
Sakura: Thank you for the opportunity. This is... deep-fried fish cake?
Shopkeep: Oh, you know of these things? Tatsumi told me about 'em- in exchange for the job!
Shopkeep: They're too good to not be snapped up by everyone! Best of luck!
Alk: So we'll be playing the role of sales reps, huh...
Light: Will Tae be able to withstand the aroma of fish cakes right in front of her? It'd be a shame to have them disappear into her mouth...
Sakura: S-sure! I think she can handle it! ...Probably!
Tae: Gwar.
Sakura: Thanks for the reassurance, Tae-chan. So we're on the same page then- absolutely no eating. Good.
Sakura: Come try our crunchy new snack! You're guaranteed to love it!
Townsperson: I'll have one, please.
Alk: Look how hard Tae's working. Guess we were worried for nothing.
Light: Perhaps you're right. I may have been overthinking it.
Dog: Woof!
Tae: Gwar!
Alk & Sakura: Eek!
Alk: No way! Wait right there!
Sakura: What do I do?! Oh, I know! Nimbus! Can you take Tae-chan's place?
Nimbus: You've gotta be kidding me!
Alk: This is bad! Really bad! A head bouncing around is going to freak people out!
Light: They couldn't have gone far. If we just search the vicinity...
Tae: Gwoo...
Alk: Thank goodness you're safe!
Tae: Gwa, gwargwar.
Alk: Yeeoowch! Keep your teeth off my hand, please!
Townsperson: I'll take two.
Nimbus: H-here you go, meow. Thank you very much, meow.
Alk: Sorry we're late! Hope there wasn't too much of a panic here.
Sakura: Oh, we managed! thanks for saving Tae-chan!
Tae: Gwar.
Alk: Phew, what a relief. By the way, Nimbus, did you just say "meow"?
Nimbus: I'm gonna forget you asked that, and you're gonna forget you heard anything! We clear?!
Light: Should Tae really be doing jobs like this? Because I'm definitely feeling uneasy.
Sakura: Ahaha... I'm sure it'll be okay next time! Right, Tae?
Tae: Gwar.
During a fan meetup, a bandit leader blending into the crowd takes Sakura hostage. Tae is quick to chomp on him, giving Alk the opportunity to fend off the entire bandit group.
Sakura: There, that should do it. You look great, Tae-chan.
Tae: Gargwar.
Alk: Glad to work with you two again. The event should be fun!
Light: Hold it, Alk! Do you realize just what sort of event it's going to be?
Alk: Sure, it's a meetup where fans get their photos taken with the idols.
Light: Therein lies the problem! What could Tatsumi possibly be thinking?!
Light: Entrusting the bite-happy Tae with an event necessitating close encounters is highly irresponsible!
Alk: Having been bitten myself, I kind of know how you feel...
Sakura: I-it'll be fine! I mean, Tae-chan doesn't ALWAYS bite people, right?
Tae: Gwar.
Alk: Why don't you get into position, Light? If she doesn't bite, then we know it'll be okay.
Light: A fine point. I suppose it's worth a try...
Tae: Gwar.
Light: HGRAAAGH!
Sakura: Tae-chan, no! Light isn't food!
Light: Indeed, nor am I some sort of chew toy!
Sakura: I-I'm sure the main event will go swimmingly! Nothing to worry about!
Alk: Today's your photo opportunity with Number 0 and Number 1! Please form a line and wait for your turn!
Townsperson: Been waiting for this! I'm hyped!
Sakura: Thanks for coming! Let's get into our poses-
Tae: Grr...
Sakura: Um, please stand over here! In between the both of us!
Sakura: Say cheese!
Alk: Next person!
Light: Her head was completely lopsided. Is that really okay for the photos?
Alk: The fans seem happy enough, so... Sure, I guess.
Alk: Next!
Sakura: Um, you might want to remove that hood for the photo-
Bandit Leader: Don't move!
Sakura: EEEEP!
Bandit Leader: If you want to see her live, then hand over your money!
Bandit Leader: Bet you're just swimming in cash with how popular your group is!
Light: This bandit must have infiltrated the crowd!
Alk: He may have allies. We'll want to be careful.
Tae: GWAAAR!
Sakura: Tae-chan?!
Bandit Leader: Rrgh! Damn, that smarts! The hell's the big idea?!
Stout Bandit: Hey, that's our boss you've sunk your teeth into!
Lanky Bandit: Let go of him, ya freak!
Tae: GRAAAWR!
Stout Bandit: AIIEE!
Bandit Leader: Holy smokes! Did I just do her in?
Alk: Meteor Break!
Light: Alk, I have the ropes ready! Let us tie them up!
Alk: Good going, Light! Are you okay, Sakura?
Sakura: Yeah! Now we just have to put Tae-chan back together!
Sakura: Tae-chan! Thank you so much for saving me earlier!
Tae: Gwar.
Alk: Looks like she's able to think for herself after all.
Light: Given that she cannot speak, we can only assume.
Light: Though I do sense a bond between you two. That much is certain.
Sakura: Tae-chan! Let's call the fans back so we can continue the photo shoot!
Tae: Gwar!
Behind stage, Light expresses concern about Sakura and Tae's upcoming performance. it starts off well enough, but everyone is thrown for a loop when Tae unexpectedly utters a death metal growl halfway through. The others play along, turning it into a screaming match of sorts. After the show, Tae expresses her gratitude by biting Light.
Sakura: Today's concert is going to be so much fun, Tae-chan!
Tae: Gwar.
Light: I wouldn't be so sure...
Alk: Well... Everything turned out okay so far, right?
Sakura: That's right. Tae-chan's really up to the challenge.
Tae: Gwar.
Sakura: See what I mean?
Light: Then again, I suppose we only need to provide support.
Alk: Yep!
Light: *sigh* How I've grown accustomed to this...
Sakura: Thank you so much for showing up today, everyone!
Tae: Gwaaar.
Audience: WHOOOO!
Sakura: We're going to party it up as Number 0 and Number 1! Here's hoping you'll follow along!
Tae: Gwaar.
Light: Their movements could not be more out of sync... And those sluggish movements are the epitome of zombiehood!
Light: I grow extremely wary! Our support does not extend to their onstage performance!
Alk: By this point, the townspeople are probably used to their quirks.
Light: So you say...
Alk: I mean, even you find Franchouchou to be an entertaining group, don't you?
Light: Indeed... I do consider myself their ally after all.
Alk: Then surely it's only natural for the audience to feel the same way.
Sakura: I've been doing plenty of jobs with Number 0 lately.
Sakura: Anyone happen to come by our sales even the other day?
Spectator 1: I brought your fish cakes!
Sakura: Thank you so much! Aren't we such a lucky pair, Number 0?!
Tae: Gwaar.
Spectator 2: I went to the photo op!
Sakura: Really?! You fans are the best!
Sakura: And the best fans deserve the best possible show we can put on! Let's gooo!
Audience: Huzzaah!
Sakura: Louder now, come on! Say it like you mean it!
Tae: GRWAAAAH!
Audience: Wha?
Light: My goodness! What was that sudden scream about?
Alk: GRAAAAAH!
Light: Alk! What's come over you?!
Alk: C'mon, Light. You give it a try too.
Alk & Light: GWAAAARRR!
Sakura: Um... GWAAAAAH!
Audience: GWAAAAARR!
Light: What have I just witnessed... More importantly, I'm bushed from all that screaming.
Alk: Same. My throat's all dry from that death metal screaming sessions in the second half.
Sakura: Great work, you two! Thanks for pitching in back there!
Alk: Ahaha... Glad we were able to fake it well enough.
Tae: Gwar.
Alk: Was that a "thank you"? Well, you're welcome.
Light: I still don't understand you well, but it's become clear to me that you care for your friends.
Light: Keep up the good work. For I will be cheering you on.
Tae: Gwaar!
Light: Ack!
Sakura: Ahaha, Tae-chan! Biting's not always the best way to express your joy, okay?
Tae: Gwagwaaar!